Hi guys welcome back to my new blog post “ Virtual worries and sorrows”. Some of you heard about virtual reality that is computer created imagination based on our needs. It is very help full for different types training in our national defense . As I said always every coin has other side .
Like this the word virtual has some negative consequences in our life. Now a days the new generations has many tools available to check the realities in their life. From this tools one of the biggest and commonly used tool is our internet giant GOOGLE .
You can get many types of information’s under the sun on google , but to check it’s validity is in your hand . In other words while searching on net do search consciously. Like this our life is full of many types of ups and downs to minimize this downs and raise our ups is our life is in our control .
Majority of the peoples worries and tells about their painful sorrows occasionally . In this modern world this type of unnecessary worries and sorrows I called “VIRTUAL WORRIES AND SORROWS “.
To eliminate this types of virtual worries and sorrows ,one should make intelligent thoughts and actions. let’s check out what are the reasons and counter measures one should need to adopt to eliminate this from the scene.
- Facts and Figures
There is a saying “Trust but verify “ , it is same in our life also . Trust every one but don’t ever forget to verify it. For example suppose you wish to buy a two wheeler so that you ask opinions of your neighbors as well as your friends .
From this type of brainstorming some tells truth some lies but how do you find the truth . The very first step you have to do is define your objective clearly .
That is I want a two wheeler to go to and from my office , and little bit of shopping . Second step is further clarify the first step , that is I want a more mileage with less maintenance two wheeler so that I can save more, or I want a elegant looks with more facilities , or I want a two wheeler below this much amount , or I want a two wheeler that my friends brought like this goes on .
Then the third and last step is collect brochures of two wheeler from different companies and check out which one suits you best as per your wish .
You can get know about two wheeler from net also but don’t forget it’s verification. At last your worries regarding about two wheeler get vanish from the scene. This is a simple case of buying a two wheeler like this check out and verify your worries and sorrows on the base of facts and figures so that the cloud you formed in our mind get vanish by beautiful sunshine.
In this modern world there many divorce cases is filing each year than marriages unnecessarily.
If you look closely into this type of divorce case you can get know they wish to live apart from each other is for simple or childish reason’s .
For example if a husband saw a man with his wife in a casual situation you slowly get doubts about your wife without asking any questions such as who is he ? what he is doing ?, where he live ? , what is his relation with your wife?.
Here before doubting your wife’s personality ask her about him more and meet him if necessary so that you can get clear picture about him so that your unnecessary worries get vanish .
I adopt a small formula but very helpful to avoid relational break in your life if you follow this , that is in the end of each month both of the partner take a white sheet of paper and writes about their partner’s positive and negative qualities .
To be more precisely divide the white sheet into two column one for to write positive qualities on right side of the sheet and negative qualities on left side of the sheet .
Now wife should write the positive and negative qualities of her husband in respective columns like wise husband should write the positive and negative qualities of his wife in respective columns. Then handover this white sheet of paper mutually .
From positive qualities husband get know how much his partner accept and respects him like this wife get know about her husband . Now the time came to eliminate their negative qualities .
Before eliminating this negative qualities , categorize them into two parts that is , is it any baseless assumptions / doubts or is there any realities .
If it is merely any types of assumptions or doubts then clear it very soon because if we allow to stay any type of doubts in our minds eventually it will become giant and explode on one day very negatively and it’s consequences may we can able to imbibe or not and sometimes others will may subject to suffer a lot .
Then if it is any type of realities check it out it’s validity and take necessary steps to avoid it. For example if a husband have the habit drinking at evening regularly then it will end very danger because in the beginning he is comfort with one or two pegs but eventually two pegs become 3,4,5,6 … at last he become addict to it .
It is ok if he drinks occasionally on functions such as marriages , engagements , housewarmings , birthday parties etc on a limit base . Like this some wife have the habit of shopping using credit card of her husband thoughtlessly .
if she continues like this then one day her whole family fall in big financial debt trap so that they find very difficult to escape from it . Here you get some facts and figures concerning your partner’s character or habits so that you can take necessary steps to avoid it else the whole family fall in many types of endanger .
In this example I say about family because analyze every problem at any level whether it is local , national , political , international , organizational ,educational from the point of family. if it is work in family , it will works anywhere.
So before worrying for anything unnecessarily laid out all the facts and figures concerning it or collect it then look into deeply whether it’s your false assumptions or is there any realities in it . In case if you found any realities then take necessary a action to eliminate it from the scene .So take decisions on facts not on false assumptions.
Experience is not what happens to a man, it is what a
man does with what happens to him . yes it is the lack of experience do most people worries about .
One thing is sure one can’t get experience unless one does . So one get experience only through our actions . Do you know thoughts leads to actions , actions leads to consequences but our thoughts may either positive or negative it depends on individual to individual.
Remember if think and do good then it’s consequences also become good . For example if you do prepare well for any exam then chances are getting positive results are more , but don’t get disheartened if you fail at your first attempt because every success have their own recipe formula for example suppose one of the well known chef makes very tasty food so that every one likes very much .
Now if you do use same recipe in the same manner the chef made then you can make very tasty dishes in your home . Take another example if you fail in the exam on your first attempt then if you follow the methods and strategies used by the exam topper so that next time you can able to win .
There is a saying “Learning with experience is better than learning without experience”. It’s either lack of your experience or your character that you get miss the chance of getting job in an interview .
Here the experience is validated by your experience certificate and your character is analyzed by the reference you mentioned in your CV (Curriculum Vitae). Suppose if you are man good character then the company will appoint you on probation .
Then after if you prove your talent and create a value to the company you are working definitely you will get more chance to get appointment . So try to get good experience from your life as well as learn from other’s life also and maintain a good character through out your life by your five sense (sight,smell,hear,touch and taste ) .
It is also a good habit to read at least one self improvement books each month and apply each good things one by one in your life . If you don’t know from where to start read then start from the following books listed below.
Remember the more you face the problems in your life ,the more experience you get which leads more you become mentally strong so that unnecessary worries in your life get vanish.
self improvement books
A little bit of fear is good but if it is become over then we have to suffer it’s consequences .There are lots of unwanted fears haunts us in our daily life .
We get know that most of fears are base less when we confront or look it closely. For example most of the students subject to exam fear .
I am asking you if a student study on a daily schedule for a short period of time then he / she doesn’t need to worry about their exams , instead they only need to take revisions on what they got studied . Like this if confront each fear with suitable countermeasures then one don’t need to worry.
As I said above there are lots of fears some of them are fears of your old parents , fears of your teachers , fears of your love , fear of your job , Fear of your health , fear of incurable diseases .
Now this COVID days people get fear most about corona virus like this the list of fears goes on . Take another example let’s talk about corona virus , see corona is not harmfull virus as one thought about it .
As a general rule that I know about the virus is , virus with high potential does not spread easily but death rate get increase and virus with less potential get spread easily and slow death rates happens. One thing is sure that we can make under control the virus with less potential by adopting suitable preventive measures .
Our corona virus comes under the second category that is virus of less potential with slow death rates . Let’s look what are the preventive measures one should need to take to fight against this little champ .
1.Always use mask
2.Keep social distance in public places
3.Wash your hands and use sanitizer frequently.
4.Adopt cashless transactions such as phone pe , Google pay , Apple pay , Samsung Pay etc.
5.Do exercise daily
6.Include more nutrientional and protein rich organic fruits and vegetables in your deit so that your immunity get raise .
7. Always take care of your kids , your old parents and old family members with suitable preventive measures.
8.Don’t stay in congested rooms for long period of time with others.
9.Avoid physical contact in every circumstances .
10 Let’s pray for spiritual support.
Ok guys these are the some of known preventive measures that I know . If you know more over this please do comment so that I will get update it for the beneficial of you all .
Some of you heard about the death of your loved ones due to corona virus because of their carelessness , not following preventive measures and may due to some other supporting diseases such as heart attack , liverosis , High BP , diabetics, pneumonia ,cancers etc, If you follow this preventive measures then why do we need to worry about it.
If we look closely into this matter we get know that there is no need to worry about it because corona virus attack is curable one .
Suppose in a place there is a hundred corona virus and you follow it’s preventive measures after few months then hundred becomes eighty then after when you follow the same preventive measure vigorously it may become from eighty to fifty so that eventually it will vanish from the scene so why do we worry about it if we know it’s preventive measures.
Through mastermind what I mean is list of peoples came for your help on your demand , may be he / she have any blood relation with you or not .
In other words your well wisher peoples are known as master minds .So list out the master mind group and make whatsgroup in the name master mind so that you can remember well later . Whenever if any worries haunts you much and you get felt exhausted do get help from this mastermind group .
Do remember this master minds groups so that you can discuss with them about your worries and can get advices or help from them . For further privacy you may categorize your master mind groups into three types namely
1.On personal level
2.On your work level
3.On your family level
Ok let’s jump into other causes of fear.
Books of great minds
Unemployment is also a one of the haunting fear . Once The Microsoft CEO Bill Gates said “ Born in poor is not your fault but die as a poor is only your fault”.
Do you know what is the one thing that every people in this world get equally ?. It’s nothing other than is TIME . majority of the peoples are saying about unemployment , have you ever thought what is the root cause of this fear ?. It’s nothing but our negative mental attitude.
Let’s check what are the causes of unemployment . Remember these all things I write based my own experience if some body feel any thing wrong please do comment on me so that I get update it.
3.Lack of education
4.Will and Determination
Ok guys these are some of the facts behind unemployment that I know . Let me explain it briefly.
As you know every one equally get in the world is 24 hours . if we utilize our valuable time on worthy things then it will shape one’s destiny. For example if you ask a Olympic Gold winner then he / she will tell you the value of time because they got win by just a fraction of seconds . They got win because they spend most of their time on practice .
In this occasion I got remember the Newton’s third law of gravity , that is “ For every action there is equal and opposite reaction “. It is literally true in every walk of our life . For example if you always do good things later good things will fall on you .
Like wise if you do harm of others later you will get harmed by others . So utilize your valuable time efficiently and remember time is more valuable than money and you are the masters of your fate and captain of our soul because we can control our thoughts and actions.
One of the other cause of unemployment is increased population . For example suppose in your joint family which consist of ten family members and your are one and only one who earns for your family .
What happens when your family members get increase by chance then you have to work hard more to meet your monthly expenses . like wise our government needs work hard to meet our national expenses .
It may be accomplished by any of the followings.
- Borrowing money from foreign countries.
- Control the population by adopting maximum two kids in a family .
- Raise the taxes .
- Need to create more job opportunities .
Which option do you like most , choice is yours. From the above option one thing is sure that we can control as a common the raise of our population by adopting suitable course of actions with least consequences.
Power of good habits
3.Lack of education
Do you know knowledge has the power which lit the candles of ignorance . According to Chanakya it is one of the prescribed duties of parents to provide good education to their childrens. Knowledge is one and only one only thing that no one can steal from you without your consent.
Remember if you invest your time in acquiring knowledge definitely later it pay it’s dividends . It is the only lack of education that our nation get not develop . So it is also the responsibility of our government to provide good education to all regardless of any caste ,tribe and religion .
Now a days peoples not following this that’s why they builds college based on religions . For example can you able to flight a aero plane . No why ? because you doesn’t have required practical and theoretical knowledge to flight a aero plane. Now you got know that how much education plays important role for acquiring a job .
4.Will and Determination
Some of you don’t know about the importance of will and determination in their life . It is only will and determination plays behind every success , if it is combined with perseverance it will go extra mile beyond our expectations .
Will and determination get form when one realize their own life purpose or by any motive and subjective Goals. For example if you want to become a IAS or IPS officer then you should need to follow the path of successful IAS ,IPS Officers patiently .
As you know to become a IAS or IPS officer is not a easy task for this you have to maintain high will power , self discipline and stay motivated always so that one day your hard work will pays back .
Like this if you have a strong will power and determinations then no forces in the universe will hold you back unless you feel defeat yourselves. So unemployment is not a matter of issue in front of one who have strong will power and determination .
It is one of the another cause of unemployment , that is creating unnecessary labor unions. For example when you joint a company the company inform you their rules and regulations for which you have to sign on their agreement paper .
So when you signed on their agreement paper keep a copy of it so that if any violation from a company ‘s side , you can sue against them .
Here there is no need of third party that is no need of labor union which creates unnecessary mess.
It is the opportunity that majority of peoples miss many times and regret for it later . Sometimes opportunity may hide in worst situations. That is why Swamy chinmayananda once said “when opportunity knocks the door either we sleep inside or gone outside”.
Remember the greatest certainties in uncertain times is opportunity and possibility. For example as you know about warren buffet one of the richest man in the world .
In his childhood days once in a park he came to see that many empty coco cola cans lies here and there so that he got an idea so he make a deal with a shopkeeper outside the park that is if shopkeeper give him one coco cola can instead of 20 empty coco cola can so that park get clean as well as he get small amount of money by selling the cola can .
Here he use a small opportunity in the park . To make this possible one should need to live in present that is remain in mindfulness always .
Take another example see in this COVID days many small garment units take initiative to produce face mask in small scale or large scale depending on demands so that they get use most of the situation financially .
Like this we can use many opportunities surround us if we take initiation .
- GALEN LITCHFIELD Method
It is widely used method to slow down your worries. You can use this method either on most of your worries or adversities .
In this method there are four rules that one should need to apply .
- Rule No 1
In rule number one list down all your concerned worries which haunts you on day and night on a white sheet of paper.
For example students may worry about their exams , grades ,some subjects, teachers etc. peoples may worry for many things such as of their incurable diseases , joblessness , job demotion, salary raise , obesities, publicities , fame ,deaths , couples bereavements , inabilities etc So list down your worries thoughtfully.
- Rule No 2
In Rule number 2 write down all the consequences of worries and possible actions that you can take to prevent it or slow down it .
For example if a student A fears or worry about the subject mathematics so what is possible actions he / she can take. As per above example you get know more about this from the following consequences and preventive measures.
1.If he / she did not focus on mathematics then it will affect his / her overall grade .
2.Mathematics is the one and only subject that no teachers in the world can minimize your mark, if you wrote well with suitable formula .
3.It will remain a fearful subject through out his / her life forever.
4.Miss to know how mathematics does affect us in our daily life.
5.Miss the chance to know about king of science.
6.Through mathematics one’s logical reasoning get improve so that it become more aid in future .
1.Get help from teachers in his / her free time in the school.
2.Get help from friends.
3.Love the subject and practice more at home.
4.Go to a separate tuition for mathematics.
like this write down all the possible consequences and actions he / she can take.
- Rule No 3
Rule no 3 is all about choosing the best course of action with least consequences . As per above example I would like to choose the option one and three that is getting help from teachers and practicing at home more so that you become more confidence in the subject you fear most .
As Chinese says “ The more you go , more you get “ like this the more you practice the more you become confidant .
- Rule No 4
In rule number 4 one need to carry out the best selected choice / options with least consequences from the listed preventive actions immediately.
- Insecurity Feelings
Insecurity feelings is also a cause of fear but it all stems from our ignorant mind . To eliminate this insecurity feeling either you have to follow the GALEN LITCHFIELD method as I said above or list down all the facts and figures concerning your fears . And Probe it deeply and take necessary actions under the guidance of your mastermind groups.
- Money Myth
It is also one of the thing behind our control is money . As i said above money is also in motion related to it’s time , that is it’s one’s thoughts and action which leads to acquire money and also one’s ruination .
Majority of the peoples believe that if they have enough money they can lead a happy life . Most of the time people not realize that happiness is a state of mind in which you feel an equilibrium .
Having money doesn’t make all your relationships flow smoothly not by a long shot. It doesn’t protect you from disease it may buy you better medical care after the event, but it doesn’t protect you.
It might buy a better diet, but the rich half of the world has a pretty poor health record despite having all the money to feed itself extremely well so that doesn’t necessarily go hand in hand. The more you see money as a solution, the greater the chance that you are missing the point entirely.
Money doesn’t do anything. You’ll be thinking, “If only I had X amount, I could fix this problem in my life.” I think you’ll find money would throw up a lot more problems in its wake. Money will not make you happier, thinner, or more popular with decent people.
Money does not deliver lasting, meaningful peace of mind. There are plenty of rich, fat, unhappy people with no real friends. I think we need to find the cure to our problems first and then find a way of funding that cure.
Money isn’t, and never will be, the cure. It is the oil that greases the wheels. It isn’t the engine.
Remember if You See Money as the Solution, You’ll
find it becomes the problem. As a law of nature if there is good then there is a bad . For example if you believe in god then you have to know about devil . In short for everything in our life there is it’s own pros and cons .
Take another example suppose you wish to buy a four wheeler , the four wheeler salesman only says about the positive side of the it so that you miss most of it’s negative side may be it may beyond your expectations .
Here the thought to buy the best four wheeler as per your expectation is in your hand . After buying the four wheeler and you came to know it’s not the one you expected then automatically you will blame your fate , luck ,time, bad opinions or salesman. what’s the use to blame your fate ,time , luck , bad opinion and salesman .
If you make a little effort before buying then it will cost you much in future. Remember Listen every one and follow no one , that is learn from every one and follow no one.
- Spiritual support
This is the last resort when every thing fails as I said above or when you become hopeless . some of you heard about some miracles happens in medical field it’s nothing but the support from the infinite intelligence .
For this you should need a strong belief on god that is why in bible it is well written “your belief may rescue you “. Some of the incurable diseases get vanish from the scene only possible through spiritual support .
Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, we cannot live without a spiritual life. Remember this We are not human beings having spiritual experiences , we are spiritual beings having human experiences .
We are not this body, we are a spiritual being. So do pray every day , believe in god and show gratitude of your blessings .
Ok guys these are the things I know about fears , post please do share among your peers consider it as my humble request to all.